We stood on the sidewalk of Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra Boulevard in disbelief and fear. The earthquake siren sounded, and Papi Martin and I could feel our legs shaking. As we looked around, all the cars that were once driving on the road were now parked on the road facing all directions. Their drivers quickly got out of their cars. From the sidewalk we could see people standing on their balconies, everyone seemed to be examining the earthquake's magnitude.
My mind shifted between the desire to look for safety and the idea that this all felt like a movie.
We were in the medical district, which meant nurses, doctors, and patients also began pouring out of hospitals. Patients still connected to their IV bags, holding onto the poles that carried whatever was directly connected to their veins. Quickly, the light blue medical gowns adorned the streets.
The earthquake's magnitude was recorded at 4.8 by the seismological services. It’s epicenter was the city of Guerrero, about 220 miles southwest of México City. Because of its proximity to surrounding cities, the national earthquake alarm was activated in México City, Chilpancingo, Acapulco, Oaxaca, Morelia, and Puebla.
Only ten minutes earlier, Papi Martin was on the third floor of a highrise depositing his sperm. And minutes later, the same staff that worked in that highrise were standing next to us on the street.
What happens to the sperm deposit? Did we need to do it again? Would this delay the process?
When depositing sperm for a procedure like this, semen samples should be collected after five days of sexual abstinence. Since the earthquake could interfere with the visit, it could be that the sperm deposit was not properly stored, and we needed to come back later.
Our original Cancun trip was from March 14-19, 2022 - we cut it short and only stayed in Cancun until the 17th and spent the 18th in México City. Since our call, FertyCare had agreed to host us for the day and had lined up a series of meetings and doctor appointments. Everything needed to happen on that one day.
The sperm deposit at CITMER was one of our three appointments on March 18th.
Our day started with a private meeting with a doctor at Hospital Español, one of the most prestigious hospitals in the city. Here, the doctor explained the biology and medical components of the surrogacy process. He detailed the exact steps of the embryo transfer and the possible scenarios we could face. The conversation was light but serious. It was the first time we sat with a medical professional to ask all the questions that crossed our minds– our previous research had always been online.
After wrapping up the meeting, we walked to CITMER, the lab where we would complete the sperm deposit. The clinic lobby was small, with a huge window into the laboratory. It reminded me of a bakery where you can see the bakers at work, except here, all the personnel were in white labs holding pipettes and carefully moving tubes from machine to table.
The deposit was quick, but we could only leave once we got clearance that the sample was sufficient and of good quality.
It was during that wait that the earthquake hit.
Following the clearance from CITMER, we headed to the FertyCare offices for our final appointment of the day. Although none of what we had done so far was confirmation that we would formally initiate the process, the meeting at the FertyCare building would be where we reviewed surrogacy packages, costs, and official timelines.
Because of our profession as educators, we wanted to ensure you were born in the summer. It would allow us more time to be with you after birth. We needed to be strategic about when we started the process. More importantly, we needed to ensure the price was aligned with what we could afford.
We were presented with several packages, from 40K to 70K. The main difference was that the premium package guaranteed a pregnancy and a baby. If needed, they would switch the egg donor, try new surrogates, and continue the embryo transfer procedures until it worked.
We didn't have 70K in the bank, but we knew this was the most secure process. Moreover, this package also pressured the agency to do everything right on its first try. We would pay 70K regardless, so it would financially benefit them if the procedure was faster.
As part of the meeting, we also met a surrogate that would potentially be assigned to us. We took 30 minutes to interview her. We asked about her home life, if she smoked, why she was doing this, etc. It was fascinating to us that someone would subject their body to make someone else's dream come true.
We continued to feel like this was right, but we left without signing the contract.
We couldn't commit to 70k without making changes back home.
Because it was March, the timeline allowed us till July to commit. We were committed to creating a financial plan to help us feel comfortable doing the process.
We sat at a bar later that night. We talked about selling our home, finding new jobs, and cutting down on unnecessary expenses. Our mindset had shifted; we now knew we were doing this, but we had to figure out how to get the money.
Regardless of the plan, we knew you would be worth every sacrifice.
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